Crazy in Love

A little fun fact/disclaimer about my family: we have never done things conventionally.  Whether it be homeschooling, planning vacations last minute, picking up and moving up the east coast because my parents felt called by God or living in China for 6 months. For years now, many people have been scratching their heads at the way we do life.  I cant say I blame anyone, but that is just who we are!

Lets take a walk down memory lane.  A little over three years ago the eldest daughter of the Peterson clan(me) was 22, pregnant and about to walk into married life with one William Fitts.  Many people were supportive and prayed for us along the way, encouraging us to get married but more importantly to listen to the Lord and follow His plan.  Others told us to wait and have a big wedding or completely thought our marriage would fail because clearly we were only getting married because I was knocked up.  We pressed forward and listened to God.

Let me spell out another story that got a lot of advice, attention, and eye rolling.  A certain blonde (Sarah) feels called to China for missions and in the process she develops a relationship over letters to a "that guy"(Matt) in prison.  These two never in a million years imagined this relationship coming to fruition but some how found themselves sharing encouragement, stories and trying to understands God's will for their lives.  Six months later they are engaged.  Two-ish years and a rollercoaster of an engagement later they are man and wife!  People made their remarks and wagers on how long it would last.  I am happy to report that they are happily married and expecting their first child! JOKE JOKE JOKING!!   Definitely not your average fairy tale but still a good one, and not the one on stage today.  

Over 4th of July weekend, my younger sister Maddie and her man Blake got engaged while the family was together celebrating the holiday.  While I suggested a flash mob proposal led by yours truly, it was done in private on the beach in one of the prettiest areas of our town.  Just the two of them agreeing to spend the rest of their lives together.  We were all thrilled!  How could we not be after hearing a shriek of excitement come from Maddie after being asked to marry her one true love!

There have been so many friends, family and even strangers reaching out to give their congratulations to Maddie and Blake.  The amount of love and encouragement was so heart warming and they were so grateful for the support!  There is nothing better than being on cloud nine and having those around you cheering you on!  Unfortunately, it has also come with many "haters" and people feeling the need to voice their opinions about Maddie and Blake's big news....

"They are too young"

"They are crazy"

"They haven't been together long enough"

I wanted to write this post not to argue with people who don't agree with the decision to get married at a young age, but to simply give a different perspective.  Maybe looking at these situations with different eyes might take away some of the opposition and negative talk.

For starters, my sisters and I were raised in a Christian home and understood the love of Christ from an early age.  While there have been, and will be seasons where we are not walking with the Lord the way we should be, we know truth.  The family as a whole believes that Jesus Christ is our Lord and Savior and He died for all of our sins.  Hold the phone, this DOES NOT mean we are perfect.  We are sinners!  We have all messed up big time and at no point claim to be perfect.  All of us struggle with sin every day but are so grateful that we serve a God who can wash our slate clean.

With all of that being said, we answer to God first and foremost and ultimately are making decisions in striving to do His will.  The Bible spells out very clearly to "Walk in obedience to all that the Lord your God has commanded you, so that you may live and prosper and prolong your days in he land you will possess."(Deutoronomy 5:33) At various points we have felt called to walk out obedience by getting married.  At the point when each of our stories got complicated, we can say that we KNEW being Will, Matt or Blake's wife was the calling God had for us.  So as daughters of the King, how are we supposed to ignore that and put it off to figure out all of our problems.  We don't.

Society condones and even applauds, sleeping around, "sewing your oats" and having various partners.   I am sad to say that getting engaged at eighteen in this day and age is condemned.   I really think if Maddie chose to fly a rainbow flag and become the first transgender surfer,  it would welcome a better responses than her engagement. Why? Because everyone would be happy for her "being true to herself" but why cant that also look like finding her soulmate, and committing to become one with him??  As for the "finding yourself" aspect of many people's reason to wait to get married.  Take me for example, I am 25 years old and have been married three years.  I am no expert on anything but I do know that I am still finding myself.  I am so glad I get to do it with my best friend, I get to face the growing pains of life with my quiet, gentle,  giant by my side.  All of my problems are not solved because I am now a wife, in fact I know am probably that much more of a target for trial,  However, it is constantly a molding shaping game along the way, but seriously who said you have to be single to find yourself???

Our world today is running away from the "old school" way of doing things and forgetting that they may have actually worked.  Ive mentioned them before but would we remember June and Ward cleaver as a wholesome and sweet model if they did things the wrong way? Was their life perfect? Probably not.  Were they out of their minds or "crazy"?  I really don't think so.  In a time that so many think that me or any of my sisters are "crazy" for being married before 25, it is so easy to forget about all of our favorite chick flicks.  Allie and Noah?? Dear John?? Rose and Jack??  No one paused the best part of the movie to say "I think they're too young!"  Lets be honest, these are the stories that we put on a pedestal and secretly hope become ours....

This is not part of some weird over populated christian family trying to get their daughters married off quickly.  I don't think you need another person to complete you, but growing together from a young age has its advantages.  I see so often people celebrating couples at their 50th and 60th anniversary.  It turns out many of these elderly couples who have grown old together met in high school and knew then, that was who they were going to spend their life with.  Maddie and Blake's desire is to simply do life with the person they love most.  They don't want to meet the circumstances of this world without their person by their side.  They want to climb the mountains together and this decision wasn't made out of insecurity or infatuation. These are two goal driven people and they are simply being as proactive in this part of their life just as any other part they have pursued. This isn't a reason for mourning, it is a reason to be celebrated!

This is not to enforce my opinion on anyone, but to simply give a different perspective on why the Petersons, Fitts, Mahers, and Barnetts are doing things the way they are.  Just maybe they are making these decisions purposefully and not just flying by the seat of their pants!  While we all miss the mark, we strive everyday to serve the Lord in all that we do.

So many who are met with Maddie and Blake's big news respond with "Why?? They are so young"  Right now I am going to propose the question "Why not?!"  My sisters and I choose to rejoice and come along side them in the good times in the bad!  Lets root for the Barnetts and raise a glass to the happy couple!!!