Crazy in Love

A little fun fact/disclaimer about my family: we have never done things conventionally.  Whether it be homeschooling, planning vacations last minute, picking up and moving up the east coast because my parents felt called by God or living in China for 6 months. For years now, many people have been scratching their heads at the way we do life.  I cant say I blame anyone, but that is just who we are!

Lets take a walk down memory lane.  A little over three years ago the eldest daughter of the Peterson clan(me) was 22, pregnant and about to walk into married life with one William Fitts.  Many people were supportive and prayed for us along the way, encouraging us to get married but more importantly to listen to the Lord and follow His plan.  Others told us to wait and have a big wedding or completely thought our marriage would fail because clearly we were only getting married because I was knocked up.  We pressed forward and listened to God.

Let me spell out another story that got a lot of advice, attention, and eye rolling.  A certain blonde (Sarah) feels called to China for missions and in the process she develops a relationship over letters to a "that guy"(Matt) in prison.  These two never in a million years imagined this relationship coming to fruition but some how found themselves sharing encouragement, stories and trying to understands God's will for their lives.  Six months later they are engaged.  Two-ish years and a rollercoaster of an engagement later they are man and wife!  People made their remarks and wagers on how long it would last.  I am happy to report that they are happily married and expecting their first child! JOKE JOKE JOKING!!   Definitely not your average fairy tale but still a good one, and not the one on stage today.  

Over 4th of July weekend, my younger sister Maddie and her man Blake got engaged while the family was together celebrating the holiday.  While I suggested a flash mob proposal led by yours truly, it was done in private on the beach in one of the prettiest areas of our town.  Just the two of them agreeing to spend the rest of their lives together.  We were all thrilled!  How could we not be after hearing a shriek of excitement come from Maddie after being asked to marry her one true love!

There have been so many friends, family and even strangers reaching out to give their congratulations to Maddie and Blake.  The amount of love and encouragement was so heart warming and they were so grateful for the support!  There is nothing better than being on cloud nine and having those around you cheering you on!  Unfortunately, it has also come with many "haters" and people feeling the need to voice their opinions about Maddie and Blake's big news....

"They are too young"

"They are crazy"

"They haven't been together long enough"

I wanted to write this post not to argue with people who don't agree with the decision to get married at a young age, but to simply give a different perspective.  Maybe looking at these situations with different eyes might take away some of the opposition and negative talk.

For starters, my sisters and I were raised in a Christian home and understood the love of Christ from an early age.  While there have been, and will be seasons where we are not walking with the Lord the way we should be, we know truth.  The family as a whole believes that Jesus Christ is our Lord and Savior and He died for all of our sins.  Hold the phone, this DOES NOT mean we are perfect.  We are sinners!  We have all messed up big time and at no point claim to be perfect.  All of us struggle with sin every day but are so grateful that we serve a God who can wash our slate clean.

With all of that being said, we answer to God first and foremost and ultimately are making decisions in striving to do His will.  The Bible spells out very clearly to "Walk in obedience to all that the Lord your God has commanded you, so that you may live and prosper and prolong your days in he land you will possess."(Deutoronomy 5:33) At various points we have felt called to walk out obedience by getting married.  At the point when each of our stories got complicated, we can say that we KNEW being Will, Matt or Blake's wife was the calling God had for us.  So as daughters of the King, how are we supposed to ignore that and put it off to figure out all of our problems.  We don't.

Society condones and even applauds, sleeping around, "sewing your oats" and having various partners.   I am sad to say that getting engaged at eighteen in this day and age is condemned.   I really think if Maddie chose to fly a rainbow flag and become the first transgender surfer,  it would welcome a better responses than her engagement. Why? Because everyone would be happy for her "being true to herself" but why cant that also look like finding her soulmate, and committing to become one with him??  As for the "finding yourself" aspect of many people's reason to wait to get married.  Take me for example, I am 25 years old and have been married three years.  I am no expert on anything but I do know that I am still finding myself.  I am so glad I get to do it with my best friend, I get to face the growing pains of life with my quiet, gentle,  giant by my side.  All of my problems are not solved because I am now a wife, in fact I know am probably that much more of a target for trial,  However, it is constantly a molding shaping game along the way, but seriously who said you have to be single to find yourself???

Our world today is running away from the "old school" way of doing things and forgetting that they may have actually worked.  Ive mentioned them before but would we remember June and Ward cleaver as a wholesome and sweet model if they did things the wrong way? Was their life perfect? Probably not.  Were they out of their minds or "crazy"?  I really don't think so.  In a time that so many think that me or any of my sisters are "crazy" for being married before 25, it is so easy to forget about all of our favorite chick flicks.  Allie and Noah?? Dear John?? Rose and Jack??  No one paused the best part of the movie to say "I think they're too young!"  Lets be honest, these are the stories that we put on a pedestal and secretly hope become ours....

This is not part of some weird over populated christian family trying to get their daughters married off quickly.  I don't think you need another person to complete you, but growing together from a young age has its advantages.  I see so often people celebrating couples at their 50th and 60th anniversary.  It turns out many of these elderly couples who have grown old together met in high school and knew then, that was who they were going to spend their life with.  Maddie and Blake's desire is to simply do life with the person they love most.  They don't want to meet the circumstances of this world without their person by their side.  They want to climb the mountains together and this decision wasn't made out of insecurity or infatuation. These are two goal driven people and they are simply being as proactive in this part of their life just as any other part they have pursued. This isn't a reason for mourning, it is a reason to be celebrated!

This is not to enforce my opinion on anyone, but to simply give a different perspective on why the Petersons, Fitts, Mahers, and Barnetts are doing things the way they are.  Just maybe they are making these decisions purposefully and not just flying by the seat of their pants!  While we all miss the mark, we strive everyday to serve the Lord in all that we do.

So many who are met with Maddie and Blake's big news respond with "Why?? They are so young"  Right now I am going to propose the question "Why not?!"  My sisters and I choose to rejoice and come along side them in the good times in the bad!  Lets root for the Barnetts and raise a glass to the happy couple!!!

Speech Update

(Please ignore the font switching back and forth, It keeps freaking out on me)

While it seems like just yesterday that I wrote about our journey thus far with Wills speech, it has actually been quite some time since I spoke about that journey.  I guess I have continued to keep this little department of my life a little on the private side. God and I have wrangled over pride and control in the past year or so and He has really opened my eyes and humbled my heart big time.  I am so thankful that the God has molded me and may have given me this vessel to help other Moms in my shoes not only have hope for their littles but more so have hope in their Lord first.

We just celebrated Wills third birthday last month and for most I think there is a race to this age to escape the "terrible twos' but for me three was a little hard to swallow knowing that it means my sweet boy is getting older and still not talking.  It sounds a little different to have a non verbal two year old and a non verbal three year old.  It also doesn't help that he is very tall for his age and looks like more of a four year old.  This makes things that much more confusing to people who don't know him well.  

All this to say that I am so humbled by the favor and progress that the Lord has provided us with the last six months.  Since my post in October, we have made the big move to Charleston and had to say goodbye to our first SLP(speech and language pathologist), Cheryl.  I teared up on our last visit with her.  Not because she miraculously got Will to talk but for the first time in his life he felt understood thanks to her working with him and equipping us with information.  In our time with Cheryl, the phrase that she kept using to describe his issues was "motor planning".  She used those words a lot and quickly concluded that he had a ton of thoughts in his head but was super frustrated because he couldn't express those thoughts and just felt terribly misunderstood.  Hence, constant meltdowns and whining.  We were told to keep up with therapy and that a lot of kids who have trouble with motor planning will turn the corner and their language will  just catch up and communicate all of a sudden.  She encouraged us to really rely sign language to communicate with Will to help with his frustration and encourage verbal language as well.  This helped his confidence so much.  We went from whining and pointing at everything to learning the sign for his wants and needs.  Still very very little verbal communication though.    

As our season in New Jersey ended I started making plans to get him in therapy in Charleston as quickly as we could.  I had no idea what a process this would be since it was such a smooth process getting him plugged in in New Jersey.  Long story short we moved January 1st and it took almost till March to even get him evaluated to see if he qualified for services.  It was so hard to sit by and wait knowing the progress he had made in his four months of therapy in NJ.  My impatience in this process seemed to prove helpful in this scenario.  I was always searching for a point of comparison for Will.  I just wanted to figure out what we were dealing with.  I was praying and begging with God to just open my eyes if there was something serious going on that we were all missing.  While I felt confident that Will was a very intelligent little boy, I knew in my heart that a "speech delay" was not all we were dealing with.  I would watch him while he played and just knew there had to be a name for what he was struggling with.  I fell back to what Cheryl said and started researching "motor planning". I thought there would be all sorts of information on childhood development and speech, and was secretly hoping there would be helpful information on ways to encourage speech with this problem.  I was disappointed that there really wasn't much information on "motor planning" in regards to speech.  Everything I found related to children struggling with gross and fine motor issues, which was something Will didn't have trouble with.  There was very little clarity until I found the word "Apraxia", Childhood Apraxia of Speech to be exact but it was what I had been looking for!

I had hit the jackpot on information that I felt like I had been spinning in circles for.  There was videos, articles, and information that all matched up.  These kids, this description, this was my Will!  There was a term for what he was struggling with and I had found it! There was no doubt in my mind.  So any who, Apraxia; the Mayo Clinic spells it out in detail here.  My short mommy definition is that the part of the brain that tells the mouth how to move is either immature, miscommunicating or being lazy. Whichever it may be, it leave these kiddos unable to form their mouth into making the sounds they want.  Reading through all of it made so much sense and all lined up with most of our mile stones along Wills two and a half years of life at this point.  So why has no one said anything or clued me in on the fact that this might be what we are struggling with??  Well it turns out this is a condition that apparently doctors and speech therapists do not like to diagnose till later and they know for sure.  That is just fine and I do not need a proper diagnosis to ease my heart.  It was more so the finding that he is not the only child on the planet that struggles with this and it gets better, KIDS DO OVERCOME THIS!!  Due to the nature of what these kids are working through it does take therapy and it does take time, but there is hope.

This gave me such confidence when we were finally set up with our SLP in Charleston.  We were introduced to the best coordinator ever!  Mrs. Lauren has seriously been an angel sent to us from the Lord.  I knew so very little about childhood development and speech and now Apraxia aside from my little bit of google, and didn't even know what questions to ask or where to start.  Lauren met with me, evaluated Will, answered any questions I had, and we made some short term goals.  After explaining to her my little Sherlock Holmes endeavors on the Internet, she agreed that Will definitely had some of the tell tale signs of Apraxia but couldn't make a call herself, and would wait for an eval from our new SLP, Shannon.  I was told that she was well versed in Apraxia and could not only identify if Will was in fact struggling with this but even better have a great game plan for overcoming it.   After a pretty in depth evaluation and asking me a ton of questions about the ins and out of life with Mr. Will Shannon was fairly confident that Will in fact had Apraxia.  His receptive language was very strong but his expressive language was super, super behind.  This was no new news to Mama.  I was so excited to not feel crazy and was so pumped that Shannon had a game plan for helping Will.  Will loved Mrs. Shannon, she always came with cool toys and could hold his attention and move so fast it looked like something from a magic show.  I would just sit and watch with my mouth hanging open.  Little mans transformation in the first month was amazing!  Shannon used different prompts, signs and cue to encourage Will to start forming new shapes with his mouth.  He was like a different child!  He realized with using these new fun sounds he can get what he wants so much more effectively and even sometimes sans whining!  Keep in mind he was not speaking in full sentences, he was simply able to say "O" for open and "Daa" for Dino.  Might sound pretty simple for your average Joe, but a reason for celebrating in the Fitts household!!

Kids with Apraxia usually don't babble very much if it all, Will was no exception.  He made very few sounds as an infant.  That is the way babies figure out how to move their mouth in different way to produce sound.  Since he didn't do much of this as a baby the muscles in his mouth have become weak, and it turns out that he was very unaware of what was going on with his mouth.  So much so that when he would start playing with something or using his hands a lot he would start to drool a ton!  The weak mouth muscles also made very simple tasks seem difficult.  For example, blowing bubbles.  That very tight O shape that you have to get your mouth to form in order for you to get enough wind to make a bubble is hard for my guy!  Will had made due for so long with the few sounds he knew how to say, so essentially we were starting from baby sounds.  We are starting with simple consonant sounds and working on the ones he knows, to adding sounds together to form words.  Like I said, I am know very little about speech lingo but have come a long way.if any of you reading this are SLPs or know a lot about speech, feel free to chuckle at my awkward description of all this!  It has warmed my Mama heart to see such progress in him but it is also so motivating to keep working with him to reach our goals knowing that we have a journey ahead of us!

We knew that when Will turned three we would have to say goodbye to Shannon due to insurance stuff, so he has recently been introduced to his newest lady friend, Mrs. Liz.  She happened to know Mrs. Shannon and got the scoop on all of Wills favorite things ( Trucks and Dinosaurs) and greeted him with a bag of each at their first meeting.  Needless to say,  Will Fitts is a fan of Mrs. Liz and would be regardless of her knowing his love language; she is so sweet and upbeat!  This was another area the Lord orchestrated so beautifully!  We were unsure of who would be Wills next SLP after he turned three and were not sure if we would be able to find anyone familiar with Apraxia.  God provided in a huge way and not only is she experienced with kiddos with Apraxia but she has such a heart for these kids!  We are so looking forward to be continuing to work with her on this journey and have her help Will to continue to strengthen those mouth muscles and form new sounds and words!  

Here is the skinny of where we are now.  We have figured out what Will's challenge is and are thrilled that we have such a great group of professionals working with him each week and training and guiding me to help him at home every day.  We have made huge strides in his speech development but here's the deal...To your average English speaking person, Will Fitts is still not talking.  He babbles and makes approximations and knows and understands what we are saying but he is no where near communicating the way a three year old should be.  In fact Crawford is on the verge of being on his level expressively.  He is not going to pick up and say full sentences one day; he is going to have to work really really hard for every single syllable.  And guess what...That is OKAY!!  Here is the great news.  Will has not changed in the funny, smart, and animated department since my last update.  He has his days like every three year old and, yes, our tantrums look a little different sometimes but he can be such a treat some days!  We play dinosaurs and trucks; we go swimming and some days we go to the ever so exciting "bok bok" (Chick fil A) and life is good! We are enjoying every little milestone for both of our boys and celebrating big with every new sound or word!  We have two little boys that are just as sweet and tender as they come every dream of mine comes true when I get to make dinner and watch them wrestle on the living room floor with their Dad. 

My dose of humble pie has been a completely different flavor than I would have ever expected but it has made my relationship with Jesus that much closer and sweeter.  Yes, my child has a pretty major speech delay but I don't think that makes me all that special; I'm just another sinner working on my stuff.  He doesn't want me to work harder to make my life more perfect, He simply wants me to "take up my cross daily and follow him"( Luke 9:23), plain and simple.  There are so many people that face big time trials with their children that bring me to tears just thinking about.  We are so terribly blessed to have healthy children, no we are so incredibly blessed to have children.  And, yes, some days I lose sight of that and lose my cool but thankfully His mercies are new every single day!  There are days that I get on my knees and give the Lord every ounce of my being and He fills in my shortcomings and gives me peace and patience that I never knew existed.  I really thought this whole thing was about me learning to have grace with my son but it has really turned into God and Will's grace for me.  The Lord has shown me so much purpose and taught me so much on this journey and it just makes me to hungry for a closer relationship with Him.  I have come to the place of not waiting for the day that Will fully speaks, but waiting for the opportunity for God to reveal more to me that I can pour out into my boys.  

The prayers and encouragement are overwhelming my squad and I in the best way!  We are so grateful for everyone who has kept up with us and reached out.  I promise to not wait another nine months before giving a speech update again because it leads to them being super long!  Woops!  Thanks for checking in on the latest Fitts adventures!!

Jersey or Bust!

What better than a little post vacation blues to inspire jumping back into my teeny place on the internet!  Every time I post I beat myself up for how long I allow between writing.  However, when I started this blog I swore to myself that I would never let this become like many other endeavors I have taken on: full blast ahead at first then very quick to fizzle out.  I am happy to remember that I have plugged along with this little blog for a year now and it lives on the short list of goals that I have stayed consistent with.  I have to remind myself that even if it is every three months, as long as I am documenting life with my little fam, making anyone feel a little more normal, or most importantly honoring God then there is no failure in it!  I am also a firm believer in doing things well or not at all.  When mom life gets crazy and I am feeling a little uninspired, dance parties and walks with the boys definitely take precedence over blogging! Not to worry, I haven't bailed on this thing!

Moving on!

While we have been immensely enjoying all that Charleston has to offer, it had been five months since we had seen my family.  My parents did a pretty good job of harassing us into coming, which I cant say I fought at any point.  We figured what better weekend than Mr. Wilbur's third Birthday!! We celebrated from the road but had big plans for birthday fun with the family when we arrived!

Our first day there was pretty chilly so we slept in and hung in our jammies for most of the morning, and indulged in apple fritters and donuts.  We were saving up our energy for our trip to the boardwalk that afternoon to let the birthday boy get his fill of rides!  Last year was a little bit of a nightmare on the boardwalk when we would have serious meltdowns when having to get off one ride and on another.  It was such a victory seeing him understand and get off each ride without a tear this year!  We also put Mr. Squishy on his first ride, he and Pop Pop rode the carousel!  They were a sight for sore eyes!

After riding the truck ride about a million times we walked home for some more gluttony with Wills favorite meal, Spaghetti and meatballs!  I was astounded.  I had never seen my children sit so still during dinner and eat so much!  It was magical for everyone.  We finished the night off with our crabby shaped birthday cake and a much needed bath for my sauce covered friends!  It was so fun to see the boys excitement of being back at my parents after so long!

I under estimated the state of the weather in new Jersey, the past month but it has pretty much been a monsoon season.  Since it was still fifty degrees outside, my kids were going to need warm clothes which I had put away over a month ago when we started seeing 80 degree days in Charleston.  It just happened to be Meme's (my mom) perfect excuse to run out and buy some Wildwood Crest Beach Patrol Hoodies.  They lived in these things the past two weeks, if it was cold at all, they were wearing their grey sweatshirts! 

Overall I felt like we did a lot of hanging out on our trip but looking back we actually stayed pretty busy.  We went to quite a few of my sister's softball games, visited the zoo, did some serious gardening for Meme(the boys that is), and of course hit up the park.  My parents have this obnoxiously heavy but super comfy futon and they couldn't seem to find a home for it so my mom got her Pinterest on and threw it on a pallet on the porch.  Thus became our morning snuggle spot.  There also happened to be a bird's nest in the wreath on my mom's front door, that had four eggs hatch in it.  We loved checking up on our baby "toit toits"(tweet tweets) each morning and came to realize that baby birds are actually quite freaky looking and then just turn into little birds that look way too big to be squished into a nest, nevertheless we had a big time keeping up with them.  I was a little traumatized by the way they left the nest one day though!  That poor mommy bird!  Sweet dependent baby one minute, and poof  up and flying off to take on the world the next! Ugh, I might just be having a hard time with mine turning three!

We were thrilled when the weather warmed up and could spend all of our time outside!  Will was constantly escaping to his "office"(shed) to pulling out all the fun stuff that he hadn't seen in months and Crawford was able to enjoy Wills  old swing and wander around in the grass.  It felt like we had never really left but crazy to see how much they had grown since we were last there.  It was exciting to see littlest man into all of the big boy things and climbing up the slide along side brother.  Im not going to lie, it was also super sweet getting to sleep in a few mornings and have a few extra sets of hands around too.  My mom even took the boys one afternoon and let me have a date with my crazy, blonde, pastor's wife sister for some grapefruit crushes and oysters.  You couldn't have slapped the smile off my face, it was such a treat! 

After almost two weeks of fun and family, our relaxing vacation was coming to a close and I was starting to put on my game face for the drive back.  Im not sure if my mom could sense the nervousness growing in me as our departure crept closer, but she stood with coffee in hand that Wednesday with a crazy look in her eye.  "What if Wills flies up for a couple days and y'all stay the weekend and drive back together?"  I really had no argument as the weather was finally turning around and I realized we were going to miss one of my favorite weekends in Wildwood.  Its not like we wouldn't be returning to the beach in Charleston but it just wasn't home.  With very little convincing, Will arrived the following morning and I had some happy little boys on my hands!!

We were doing as much as we could while big Will was there!  We were finally able to get on the beach which I was very nervous about....  I haven't talked about this much but Will has always been a beach kid.  Not that he has ever had much of a choice because we are beach people, we will always be beach people.  To not like the beach is not really an option in our tribe.  Much to my luck the second we start frequenting the beaches in Charleston, my child is suddenly horrified by the beach.  Water, sand, hated all of it.  We had slowly workup up to putting our feet in the water after about two hours but we were not digging the beach thing.  I was so afraid to now try this in Wildwood where the beach is super long!  Well folks, it turns out my child is not afraid of the beach!  He is in fact very particular about what beach he prefers to visit.  That boy marched down the sand with a smile on his face and ran straight for the water!  He simply needed some familiar sand between his toes! Cue Mom and Dads enormous sigh of relief!!

We ended our beach day with your typical Memorial Day cookout.  The kind where Will plays grill master, I play Margarita maker, our sandy, sun-kissed babies ran around the yard and we stuffed our faces with burgers and potato salad.  We then proceeded to all sleep like rocks until our tourist neighbors decided to play beer baseball in the street outside our window at two am...it was adorable.  This was not the type of life and vacationers I enjoyed about Memorial Day weekend but I am so thankful for Wildwood Crest's finest for coming to silence our friends before the fifth inning of their little game.  

Our last day in town was spent visiting with friends and family and hitting the boardwalk one more time, along with everyone else in the state of New Jersey.  Seriously, everyone on the island came to the boardwalk that day.  That mad house was worth it to see that gapped- tooth smile cheesing on every ride!  Finally it was time to pack up and face the reality that we would have to leave the beautiful Jersey Shore and go back to the dreaded Charleston...joking that sounds terribly backwards doesn't it?!  I was sad to leave my family but knew we would be back later this summer!  

Later that evening Will and I agreed that the vacation just didn't seem complete....we were lacking ice cream.  Just after the kids went to bed, Meme clocked in and Will and I jumped in my parents old jeep and had an impromptu date night at Kohr. Brothers. It was quite the romantical wrap up to our trip!  Our Nicholas Sparks moment was followed by an early night to bed knowing that we would be departing at four a.m. to beat memorial day traffic.  The whole ride home we reminisced on our blessed we are to have such a fun and loving camp up in that little town.  There is just nothing better than family.

So here we sit.  Back in the full swing  of real life.  Will is back to work and we are back in the speech therapy grind with little Will.  The plan is to head north again for the fourth of July so I have about a month to work off last weeks fritters and pizza along with some very persistent baby weight.  All while trying to potty train, get rid of binkies and organize our house for our next move(yes I said move).  June should be an interesting month, folks!  Thanks for reading!

Nap Time in a Nutshell

I some days wonder what the heck I did when I had one child.  When Will was an infant he was my champion sleeper and would not only sleep through the night but would also take two solid naps throughout the day.  Besides leaving the house, I could pretty much do whatever I wanted!  Life wasn't as complete before Mr Crawford but looking back I wish I would have savored those long and rarely interrupted nap times!

With that being said, I feel like it has been a common theme amongst Mamas lately that nap time has been  either a sweet success or an ongoing battle on the struggle bus.  I hate to disappoint but this post is not about the magic solution I have found to get your children to nap or sleep through the night.  I am still wrestling with Baby Wise and every other secret routine I have found on Pinterest with no avail.

Not only is it GLORIOUS when everyone is napping in unison but it also has led to one of the sweetest parts of my day when it works out.  Some days I tear around like a crazy woman conquering as many chores as I can while trying to throw dinner in the crockpot.  On these afternoons, I drink my second cup of coffee in more of a chugging fashion.  I have also found that I am much more likely to wake the children when I try to accomplish too much, which has led me to nap scenario number two.    As soon as everyone is snoozing, I rush downstairs, crank up the Keurig, snuggle in my spot on the couch (everyone has their personal corner on the couch right?) and call my mom.  She is usually having her afternoon cup as well and we just chit chat and solve the problems of the world together.

Getting a little off topic.  I almost always have some sort of snack with my afternoon coffee and I have yet to find many things more satisfying than something sweet and a cup of coffee. The combo is my absolute favorite. In the occasion that we have cupcakes or cookies in my house as soon as I wake up I will be anticipating my quiet moment eating my cupcake and washing it down with my warm cup of crack. It is just divine. Even if I am trying to behave I can usually satisfy that sweet fix with a protein bar or apple with peanut butter.  Kind bars have been my favorite lately. Really any coffee and sweet combo, you just cant beat it.

While nap time, in sync or not, always involves coffee, it looks different some days.  I love using that time to Facetime my sisters or friends from Memphis, or some days I have my priority time if the morning got crazy.  Then there are just some afternoons where I am just still and stare at pictures of the boys because I miss them while they are snoozing.   Whatever that time may hold, I am so thankful for every second of it.

I don't ever want to get so determined about having "me time" that I become too adamant about structured nap time.  There are MANY days that Crawford is putting in his two cents while Meme and Mama save the world over coffee.  If in fact nap time for either child ends up being a fail, it is really not all that much of a fail at all.  Nap time has really become a win win, Ive realized.  In a time of life where I am often being pulled between two of the things I love most, a little date with either of my boys makes the afternoon so much sweeter.  Sometime C just wants to be nursed for the 60th time that day and then we lay on the floor and play, or every blue moon Will boycotts nap and we split and apple on the couch and giggle about Dinosaurs.

What ever nap time( or lack thereof) looks like, I have learned that it is the moment that I feel defeated for failing to get my children to sleep, I also receive the gift of one-on-one time with either of my boys.  Just another way God is changing my heart and teaching me to look at things through different eyes.  A glance at an old picture will be the swift reminder I need that these moments are passing too quick for me to be okay with.  Whatever nap time looks like at your house, a bath, a coffee, or heck even a pint of ice cream, enjoy it Mama! You're doing great!!

Pizza Partay

As of lately I have been looking for ways to be more frugal.  I would consider it recovering from a pretty intense spending problem in my high school and college years( another blog for another day)  Anywho, it turns out eating out costs a lot more than eating in.  Like A LOT.  Thanks to my friends of the small child variety, we rarely are up to the task of going to eat at a restaurant regardless of the cost.  Our table ends up looking like a crayon and puff war zone.   

Luckily, my mom is always good at making routine activities a little more exciting.  She suggested creating a fun night making homemade pizza.  

I was little leery of this at first being that I consider myself a bit of a pizza snob.  I was raised in a town that is home of undoubtedly the best pizza place on the planet.  Some might disagree but all of my Jersey readers are now nodding their head and probably drooling at the mere mention of the one and only Sam's Pizza.  It's not fancy but it is the best and that's all I have to say about that.  I knew making our own pizza would be like apples and oranges to what we have been used to but I figured it was worth a try.  

After three months, I can honestly say Friday night pizza is what I most look forward to during the week.  Every Friday during nap time, Lord willing for both children, I make the dough and set it aside to let it rise for the next few hours. I have researched a handful of recipes and I keep coming back to this one.   It is a big enough batch that we can make Wilbur his little personal pizza, 3 thin crust pizzas for Mom and Dad and even have some dough left over for bread sticks.  There is always plenty left over and we usually eat it for lunch the next day.  I feel like each week I am tweaking the crust a little too see how I can improve.  I am also hoping to find a healthier recipe in the future since, you know, carbs are the enemy.

What has really been a fun way to get creative is with toppings.  We usually always make one plain(cheese) pizza and then see what we can come up with for the other two.  So far Will has simple taste and loves the pineapple and pepperoni.  One of our first weeks we did a white pizza with prosciutto and arugula then drizzled aged balsamic on top, and I am still having dreams about it!  Some combinations turn out great and others, eh not so much.  Fortunately, my gracious husband tells me its his favorite even if some weeks they turn out borderline inedible.  

I had hoped to include little Will in the process but it led to flour everywhere and him eating cheese by the handful so we have resorted to movie time while Mom makes the pizzas.  We have been all about the Good Dinosaur lately, even though I could cry just talking about that stinkin sad movie.
It usually gives me just enough time to make little man's pizza and let him eat while I make the big kid pizzas.  By the time Dad gets home, the kids are bathed, full and ready for bed.  Mom is sweating and covered in flour but that it okay because date night commences as soon as the children are asleep.  The reason I hit the gym during the week is because come 7:00 Friday night I know I am stuffing my face with circle shaped Italian goodness with my fella by my side!

I really do hope this will be a tradition we can continue, even if it ends up being once a month.  This little party we have been enjoying is a nice way to keep things simple and inwardly focused.  There are so many pulls to be all over the place and trying to get out of the house.  I had hoped this would be less of a recipe post and more of a " how to have fun without leaving the house" post. The Lord has really laid it on my heart lately to just be a better steward over what He has blessed us with and to invest in my little family in new ways.  I know that the boys wont have any recollection of having Domino's delivered but my hope is that Friday Night Pizza Parties at home will be a sweet memory when they are big and grown(even though Im not letting them get big or grown!)

As always, I LOVE feedback!  Please feel free to share your favorite pizza recipe or your fondest family night memories.  Thanks for reading! 

Life Lately

My blog this month has become like  my relationship with my grandmother.  I mean to call once a week or at least once a month but life gets crazy and time just seems to disappear.  I really do love her and want to talk to her and update her on my life but the longer I put off the phone call, the more guilt I have for that call taking so long.  So here I am, shamefully dialing her number, feeling bad but knowing she loves me anyways :) Right?  Sorry blog, I promise to do better.

Life lately has been hectic but a little monotonous for the most part.  I feel like my family is in a "grind" season.  Every week we are working towards being on a better schedule, getting more accomplished and when Will and I do get a little bit of time on Friday night for a movie, we are both usually catching flies fifteen minutes into the new James Bond movie for the fifth time because we cant seem to get through that stinkin movie.

In our short time of being South Carolina residents, I have been reminded of how much I LOVE the south.  While I am a Jersey girl at heart, nothing warms my soul like some sweet tea and smocked children's outfits.  It just feels friendly everywhere you go down here.  We have moved about 30 minutes away from one of the most beautiful and historic cities in the country.  However, fun fact, not all of the surrounding areas of Charleston have the pastel colored beach houses and waterfront views.  There are actually some parts right around this amazing city that are just a little on the plain and not so fancy side, but are a very convenient distance from the Navy base.  While I knew we were moving into a very cookie cutter, suburban house, a good distance from downtown; for some reason I expected to see palm trees and cobblestone leading up to our neighborhood and was even hoping to get a whiff of the ocean from my driveway.  Yes, I was a little unrealistically disappointed on moving day.  Fortunately that feeling didn't last long knowing we weren't too far from that magical place everyone raves about.

Most days feel like the epitome of the early years of motherhood.  The race of meals, naps, toys and bath time.  The abrupt transition from catching a nap while my parents play with the kids, to praying that naps are in sync so I can catch a shower was a rude awakening for me.  Big Will has been way busier with school than any of us anticipated.  He ends up just being home a couple hours for dinner most evenings and then heads back to study till late.   This part of training has been a really big challenge for him and it has really made me feel the need to help him in any way I can.  School is more important than me getting help with the kids right now so I try my hardest to just greet him with a warm meal, some encouragement and a swift kick back out the door to go study more.

Even though we really don't eat out much in trying to save money and since two years old and seven months old is not really a prime age to be frequenting restaurants, we have been able to check out downtown a few times.  We took on King St while Wills parents were in town and let me tell you, the reviews were spot on.  Not only do you have all of the best shopping you could ever ask for but they are all nestled between the most beautiful old buildings.  The food, the shopping, the ocean, the houses; it is seriously the most breathtaking town I have ever encountered!! I am so excited to experience more of Charleston during our time here.  One of the few restaurants we checked out downtown was an upscale barbecue place and I am quite convinced that it was designed by Chip and Joanna Gaines.  I mean, what is better than shiplap and pulled pork??

After a recommendation from Wills speech therapist, I knew as soon as we moved here I wanted to get Will in some sort of mothers day out program.  For some reason the north has not caught onto the whole idea of MDO.  It seems to be that it is daycare or nothing.  A real travesty if you ask me.  My Mama heart was not ready for this but I knew the socialization and structure would help his speech.  Frankly, I also knew he was getting a little bored with Brother and I, and was dying for some play time with other kids.  Fortunately after a little searching we found a fantastic Mothers Morning Out program at a local church that was just the perfect fit for us.  We were able to ease into it with just two days a week.  I was not sure how he would handle this new environment for four hours a day but he tries to ditch me as soon as we get in the building and dart off to his class.  He also insists on going back and blowing kisses to his teachers as we are leaving.  It is just the best feeling seeing someone else love on your baby so well!!

The past two months have been all about finding our new "normal", not only being in a new area but also getting used to living as a family of four.  Its been all about trying to get back to the gym, getting a little more frugal, meal planning, cleaning and all that fun stuff.  Some might call it boring, but Im not going to lie, I love a good to-do list and a little cleaning.  However, laundry, I could do without.  While it is exciting to have new adventures to plan, it still has us a bit out of our comfort zone.  God has really tugged at my heart to trust in His timing when it comes to the getting plugged in and the overwhelming parts of being in a new area. I know this is a season and with that is just more challenges that make me realize I need to stay hungry for God and His word.  He is the only one who NEVER lets me down.  On the tough days I can remember that He is molding me and shaping me.  This transition has not been super easy but I really do think the Lord has just been comforting me and coming in exactly when I need it.  It also helps that I have a mom and three sisters that I can call and talk their ear off when I need someone to drink my nap time coffee with!

This update was little all over the place, but I guess you could say I am a little all over the place.  Thanks for being patient with me and my little blog! Stay tuned for our next update or crazy adventure!

A Letter to my 6 Month Old

My Crawford,

I know that everyone says that you find room in your heart to love a second child as much as your first but I don't completely agree with that.  I am more than convinced that in July I grew another heart entirely.  Life with you in it has made us all so content.  We prayed so hard for you.  The wait for your life was such a learning time for your Dad and I.  God bended us and made us trust Him before we were blessed with the news of your little self.  The timing was more perfect than we could have imagined. You were the perfect piece to our puzzle,and were created as a part of God's sweet vision for the Fitts.  In a year full of highs and lows, you have been the sweet treat in the middle.  In 2015, you were what we were either looking forward to or what we were enjoying immensely.

I guess you could say that if I were to ever have a child with myself, that he would look a little something like you.  It has been so fun to have a little Will running around , and now to have a mini Chelsea to hold and snuggle has me over the moon!  I am very sorry you didn't get a more endearing nickname, Mr. Squishy.  After your 35 week ultrasound we noticed how terribly "squished" your little face was in the picture.  Furthermore, after discovering what a pudgy newborn you were, the name sort of stuck.  Maybe it will wear off.... However, when you aren't being referred to as squishy, your real name suits you just as well.  While we thought some other nick names might come from it, you seem to be very much a Crawford.  I don't know what makes someone a Crawford but you, my darling, are certainly one.

I'm not quite sure when the new baby feeling will wear off, but I am certain I don't want it to.  I am well aware of how fast a newborn turns into a two year old and it makes me just want to hang on to every last moment I can and spend it kissing your fat face.  It has been amazing to see you go from the sleepy and snuggly newborn to a giggling, cheesin, squealing baby!  These past six months are mind blowing when you think about how much your little body is growing, changing and learning.

There is no better experience on the planet than going to greet you after a nap.  You barely crack your eyes open before you are grinning ear to ear, kicking those legs like they just might lift you from the crib.  Your little non existent top lip makes you look like a little turtle.  I can only pray you are always this happy to see me when you wake up.

At about three months old you developed a need for a bit more attention.  You are easy to please though, a simple man who just need a warm body to look at and chat with.  This is not limited to me or even people you know.  A smile or hello from a perfect stranger at Target will get that smile going in a jiff!

While you have many strengths, I also have to touch on your one weakness.  Sweet boy, bless it, you do not like to sleep at night!  You are pretty solid when it comes to naps but the sun goes down and you become the most alert and hungry bed partner I ever did meet.  Yes, I have probably created this monster with giving in and putting you in bed with us.  What can I say, the "please hold me" shriek you let out just kills me!  I'm a sucker, I know.  However, at six months old, I would like to think we can improve on this a little.  While the 2am party bus is exhausting, I know there will be a day that I don't have a baby to snuggle back to sleep in the middle of the night so I am going to enjoy the parts that I know I will miss.  

You love your brother.  While the feeling is not always mutual, you absolutely light up the second you hear him start to babble about trucks or say "Hiiiiii".  Lately, you have started to grab onto his clothes and pull yourself over close enough to rub your gums on him.  At that point he'll give you a swift nudge to get you to stop but that is usually followed by a squeal of joy.  You are just elated that he was showing you some sort of attention.  I know it is not a fun time for Will but it is too cute not to watch.  I foresee quite a few WWE moments in our future!

Over the past month you have become so active.  You roll and scoot EVERYWHERE.  Even though you aren't crawling yet, I wouldn't even refer to you as immobile anymore.  You will work for 20 minutes to scoot over to the truck will left on the floor, in the hopes that you just found your next teething toy.  You have been gnawing on everything and anything you can get your hands on.  While we keep thinking a tooth will pop through any day, I secretly pray that day is not too soon upon us.  I just love a gummy smile.

A department that you and brother differ so much in is eating.  While he wasn't great at nursing and was not all that enamored with food, you win the piggy award!  He eats to live and you live to eat, which has very much contributed to your "soft" figure.  While we haven't started solids(yet), you grab at our food whenever it is in arm's reach.  You love nursing.  I am certain you would eat all day long if I let you.  You are the loudest eater and your little nursing noises are my favorite.  That content little grunt just makes me feel like I'm doing something right.  I think there is somewhat of a snorting sound in there as you gulp and breath super loud but it is the sweetest.  Rocking and nursing at night are my favorite, its uninterrupted and oh so quiet.  

You are quite possibly the happiest baby I have ever encountered.  Everyone who knows you comments on what an easy baby you are.  I just love your jolly little "go with the flow" spirit, truly fitting the personality of a second child.  I am always amazed at the way you can make me feel like the only person that matters in the world.  Granted, I am your walking, talking food supply but you make me feel important nonetheless. The past six months have been such an adventure and while you growing is bittersweet, I am so looking forward to all the firsts we have ahead of us.

Thank you for being so patient with me and letting me learn how to keep my head above water raising two littles.  I wish I had more time to soak in the (what feels like ) seconds of this stage of life, but thank you for being the nudge to slow everything down and live in the present.  There is a very short season where I am able to just sit cheek to cheek with you and smell your sweet baby scent and kiss those cheeks incessantly.  I pray that you stay a Mama's boy forever.  You make my heart sing precious boy.  I love you so....

Happy Half Birthday!